"OUR TERRIBLE, TROUBLING GOD"

Job 23:1-17; Mark 10:17-31; Hebrews 4:12-16

There are days

when the day's lectionary readings

seem to have nothing in common.

And then there are days like today.

All three of today's readings

seem to point in the same direction.

And the direction they point

is not necessarily one where we like to look.

But that's what we're being asked to do.

So, listen for God's word as we find it?

(read scriptures)

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Sometimes,

the folks who select the lectionary readings

edit them because they'd be a little too long to read in worship. .

But then other times,

they edit them

in order to be a little more politically correct.

That's what happened with today's reading from Job.

I thought they had left out verses ten through fifteen

just to save some time.

But when you look at it,

the part they were leaving out

was the part

where Job admits to being terrified of God,

and dreading to be in God's presence.

If you go only by the lectionary,

we can't talk about being terrified by God.

That may be the best-kept secret in Christianity.

Sometimes,

our relationship with God can terrify us.

So many people talk about God

in only rapturous tones,

saying that God is their best friend

and that God would never do anything

other than what they want God to do.

Then the rest of us,

who wonder what God is up to

and why God hasn't answered our prayers yet

and whether God was really behind

the terrible thing that happened to us -

well, we keep our thoughts to ourselves

and don't say anything.

Friends, I'm not saying

that God can't be wonderful and warm

and loving and funny

and as close to us as the air we breathe.

But if that is the only way that we experience God,

well, in the words of the famous book by J.B. Phillips,

"our God is too small."

God is not the sweet old doting grandparent

that we would like to think.

Hebrews tells us

that God's word is a sharp, two-edged sword.

We don't do ourselves any favors

by reducing God to something quaint or harmless.

I'm not saying that God is a terrorist,

in the sense of doing random acts of violence

that keep us afraid,

or intending to send us straight to hell

unless we say the magic word.

That's not who God is.

But neither will God be domesticated

and trained to do as we please.

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Just the thought of that //

is terrifying enough in itself, isn't it?

We can understand

exactly where Job was coming from.

Nothing terrifies us more

than thinking we're in control,

and finding out that we're not.

We expect

that if we do all the right things,

then no harm will come to us.

We think that if we say just the right prayer

and come to church often enough

and watch our language

and give away what we think is our fair share,

then we will always be wealthy and beautiful

and we'll win every round of Texas Hold'em.

We have been fooled into thinking

that air bags will save every life in a car accident,

that safety devices around our homes

will prevent our children from every injury,

that antioxidants will keep us totally healthy

and moisturizer will keep us totally young.

But that's not how it works.

Job knew it,

and we know it.

Life will still happen to us as long as we live.

People we love will fall ill for no reason.

The best drivers will have tragic accidents.

We can be the world's best employee //

and our job might not be there tomorrow.

Things that seem totally innocent

can turn utterly devastating.

We can never be perfect enough

to prevent life from happening to us.

It is not at all fair.

And it is terrifying.

And if we think that God has anything to do with it,

we are terrified all the more.

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If nothing is more terrifying

than realizing we are not in control,

nothing is more troubling

than the realization that God wants us:

God wants all of us,

and God wants it all from us:

our money,

our time,

our careers,

our priorities,

our minds,

the places we surf on the Internet,

the friends we hang out with,

the way we interact with those we love.  

God wants it all.

God is not interested in just ten percent of our money,

if indeed we tithe to begin with.

God wants to be part of all of our finances.

God is not interested in just one day a week

or one or two hours on Sunday morning.

God wants to be part of all of our time.

We can consult our tax return

and figure out ten percent to the penny.

We can go a whole year

and not miss one Sunday of church.

We can serve on THREE committees.

But there's still one thing we lack.

If there is anything we are holding back from God,

then there's something in the way

of our relationship with God.

The man we have come over the years to call

"the rich young ruler"

learned that lesson the hard way,

Mark tells us.

He surely thought he was in control of life.

He knew all the commandments

and followed them.

He probably had a reserved seat in the synagogue.

But Jesus told him

there was one more thing he needed to acquire.

Isn't that ironic:

Jesus said to him that he lacked one thing,

but Mark tells us he turned away

because he had many things.

All those possessions -

and he still didn't have what he needed. 

It was troubling for the rich young ruler,

and friends,

for those of us who want for nothing,

it should be troubling to us too.

It doesn't matter where we are

in the tax bracket.

You and I are among the wealthiest people in the world.

We have homes, and food, and clothing.

We have free speech and the right to vote.

We have access to education and the arts.

We have disposable income and disposable time.

We have the freedom and privilege to worship,

as often as we will.

We cherish our independence.

But today,

you and I are confronted

with a terrifying, troubling God

whom we cannot contain or control -

and who will not settle

for just whatever fraction of our lives

that we think we have to give.

God wants every last part of us -

even our illusion of control.

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So what can we do about it?

How can we get there,

to the place where we are able to give ourselves wholly to God

without holding anything back?

I think that just about the only thing

that will keep our relationship with God in right perspective

is if we can approach that relationship,

and actually all our relationships,

with a sense of humility.

If we can recognize our state of dependency upon God,

we can start to see

how it is that we are dependent upon others as well.

Humility is strong enough

to dash our need for control,

which should take care of the "terrifying" part.

And humility is also strong enough

to enable us to do whatever Jesus asks of us,

which takes care of the "troubling" part.

So many people think of humility as a sign of weakness.

Humility is the word that Paul used

to describe the willingness of Jesus

to endure the cross.

And if that's humility,

I can think of nothing stronger.

If there is any hope for us

to deal with a terrifying and troubling God,

it begins with our being able

to identify where we end and where God begins,

and in so doing

acknowledging the power

of the One who is REALLY in charge.

Once we have done that,

then we are ready to ask ourselves the big question.

What is the one thing that WE lack?

I don't mean Nintendo or a new car

or anything tangible.

I mean the really important things.

There's probably more than one,

once you get started thinking about it,

but let's take one at a time.

Let's say that we were in the place

of that young man.

We're all in relatively good religious shape, I'd say.

We are Presbyterians, after all!

We attend worship most of the time.

We could probably name at least five of the ten commandments,

if pressed.

We give what we think we can,

even if it could be a little more.

We try to read our Bible whenever we think about it.

And we CERTAINLY know enough

to address Jesus as "good teacher."

So, imagine now for a minute

that Jesus is talking to some friends

just a few yards away from you.

You get up your nerve

to go over and introduce yourself to him,

and then you pop the question.

"Good teacher," you say,

"What must I do to inherit eternal life?"

Jesus says,

"Well, you DO go to First Presbyterian in Bonham.

That means you know the commandments, right?"

You own that you do,

and you begin to recite a list of the ways that you are active here.

You mention the fact that you're in one of the Bible studies,

that you play or sing in one of the choirs,

you help out on a really busy committee,

and you never miss the Easter sunrise service.

You're even planning to increase your pledge for 2007.

He raises his eyebrow.

He's silent for a minute.

Clearly he's thinking.

Then he looks you straight in the eye and says,

"But one thing you lack."

What is it?

What are you holding back from God?

Is there any possession,

any habit,

any relationship,

anything at all,

that would cause you to walk away from Jesus in sorrow?

I have come up with mine,

and it's been bothering me all weekend.

Now I invite you to come up with yours.

And I want us to come up with our list as a congregation, too.

What is it that we lack

as First Presbyterian Church?

What's holding us back

from truly serving Jesus fully and completely?

What do we need to set aside,

and what do we need to take on?

Where is it that we as a congregation

are being called to go?

What does God want us to give up

so that we can be fully about the ministry God has given us?

I hope that our Session

will talk about this on Wednesday night.

I hope that you will talk about it

with your family and friends at lunch today.

Bring it up.

Ask the hard questions.

God can be terrifying, for sure.

Jesus troubles us

when he asks something of us.

But with a spirit of humility,

we can give up the things that rightly belong to God.

And once we get ourselves out of the way,

there's no telling where God will take us -

as individuals,

and as a church.

Let's be listening.

Amen.